I love living in a small town...the familiarity, the hospitable smiles, the knowledge a friendly face is just a few steps away...and nothing brings out the Norman Rockwell feel like the 4th of July and the festivities that go with it. However nostalgic and homey this weekend felt though, there were moments that were much more Life with the Kardashians than Little House on the Prairie...but that is what makes my life, my life...and what provides the humor for you and this blog.
We started off the weekend enjoying an outdoor concert Friday night with a local favorite...the music was great, the weather was gorgeous and I felt like I was back in VA...listening to a country boy sing the night away. I had to laugh though, as this "country boy" grew up 30 minutes off the coast of CA so the twang that was deeper than mine could have been purchased off of a CMT infomercial. But, no need to be a hater...so I just kicked back with family and friends and enjoyed the sights. The little kids, just past the stage of walking, showing off their moves on the dance floor...the teenage girls testing their skills of attracting the poor pubescent boys who have no idea what they are in for and then, the true highlights of the night...the women who are just past their prime but who lack that important friend to say "You really aren't going to wear that, are you?". I'm not even sure they qualify as cougars any more...But, I just sigh and think that if this is what life is like outside my cozy home on Friday nights, then I'm going to be really good friends with my DVR'd episodes of Sex and the City.
Saturday night found us at the street dance, once again watching the just too short dresses and the heels just a tad too high but this time we actually knew at least one of the culprits...I really don't mind the girlfriend of my former husband: she is usually pleasant and doesn't try to be mom to my kids even if I do believe some of the outfits she has chosen to wear definitely hover over the line of inappropriate (i.e. taking my children trick or treating in a leather bustiere/chaps sheriff's outfit). Saturday night street dance definitely earned the full effect of 4 inch stilettos and those ripped jeans from before. Again, not really a problem...but I guess she now has a problem with me. Full family affair downtown and I hug my former brother and sister in law while my sister, her husband and kids do the hi's with the ex...All the while I'm getting the eye rolls and humph sighs from the GF. Really? Have the last 5+ years of us being separated/divorced not shown her that I am so not interested. I obviously requested the divorce for a reason so why in the world would she be concerned I'm the least bit interested in the starring role?? Mind you, this is not a young woman, who may not have left the drama behind....this is a 46 year old, should be past this nonsense, kinda gal. I would laugh out loud if it didn't cause a strain in my otherwise very good relationship with my former husband. As always, conflict avoidance is his game so "Hey, who needs a drink??" were the only words I heard from him.
Okay, I will admit, I like being the "perfect girl next door who got away"...his parents love me, I can still laugh and have fun with my sister in law, people comment about how great we are as friends...and yes, I eat it up. But, truly, I'm not evil...AND, more importantly, I really like our life the way it is. I don't want to be married to him. If I did, we wouldn't have ever split up in the first place. So, while the rest of the weekend was spent at the parade, swimming & fireworks with my current and former family, the GF was no where to be seen. Without sounding completely callous, have decided I really am okay if she is one of the few people in the world who just don't like me.
"Go big or stay home" is a popular saying in my family so not surprised when the potential drama just kept on coming. While waiting for the first old car to make its entrance, announcing the start of the parade, I saw a good friend entertaining the troops at her house along the parade route so left the kids in the capable hands of family and went off to say hello. She has been an incredibly supportive aspect in my life; even though history meant she didn't really have to be. Our daughters were bff's in pre-school and I got a very nice note home one day (not long after Alex and I combined homes) asking for a play date. I had heard my daughter mention this friend on numerous occasions but, as 3 year olds, there was never a last name attached. "Babe, isn't XXXX the last name of Donna (his first wife)". "Yes, why?" Well....and yes, my daughter had befriended the cousin of her very close knit family. I, of course, laughed completely when I realized my worlds were destined to continue to collide...regardless of who set the balls in orbit.
No biggie...actually...and the start of a beautiful friendship for all parties involved ensued. Alex was able to reconnect with members of his former family whom he missed, my daughter got to have tons of fun with her buddy and I gained an incredible friend. At the street dance last year, just mere weeks after THE MOVE, I got a much needed hug from her and exactly what I needed to hear "He didn't deserve you and the kids...you'll be fine." As I walked across the street to give a big hug, she disappeared and I found myself face to face with Alex's former sister-in-law. I, of course, knew exactly who she was...and, from the look on her face, I think she knew me. However, as I asked where Sam went, she introduced herself and we had a few moments of idle chit chat. I think though, warning bells were sounded inside, as Sam came running out to diffuse the situation...I actually wouldn't have minded the acknowledgement of the situation as I have never had anything against his first wife. They married young, and knowing him, know they just weren't matched properly. But, as the woman who entered his life next, they may not think too highly of me so maybe it was better left unsaid.
While the true fireworks really were saved for the sky last night, I laughed to myself as I recalled my counselor's quips about my life and its movie quality. While Prince Charming hasn't hit his head again to realize what a mistake he made, I do see her point. Although I think I better come to the realization we're talking about slapstick comedy of errors vs. Hollywood's big love story. Oh well, I'll just get some popcorn and enjoy the ride.
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