I’ve never been much of a pageant girl…well, I was in one, once in high school as Miss Junior Class, but that was the extent of my time on the pseudo cat-walk. It shouldn’t come as much of a surprise however, as there really just aren’t that many pageants geared to those of us who are 5’2” and fluffy. What shows those would be…definitely no bathing suit contests, and heels would just be used to make us look normal sized…hmmm…I may be on to something. Anyhow, this weekend found me helping my dear friend/dating coach with the junior princess portion of a local qualifying pageant for Miss California and well, as one could only imagine, I figured there had to be a blog in there somewhere.
Ignoring the inherent issues that are woven into the general concepts of beauty pageants, I actually decided there is some merit to being judged on a select set of categories. I mean, if you really think about it, isn’t that happening already? Aren't we all judged by appearance, behavior, etc...So, why not just own up to it and get a score that enables you to gauge the chance you are going to get that second date or follow up phone call. Granted, I think the categories may be a little different as I judge myself harshly enough in a bathing suit, I don’t need a number score to confirm I could exercise from now until New Year’s and still not have a butt that doesn’t stop when I do.
But, you get my point right? Let’s take this weekend as a perfect example of how my contest meets reality would work. On Friday night, I went to go see Blake Shelton with my dating boss, her husband and the hot electrician…yes, him. We had a great time…dinner, walking to the concert in the rain (which, in reality is nooooooowhere near as romantic as Gene Kelley makes it in the movie) and then singing and laughing to Blake. To a casual observer, we seemed a couple. Now, don’t worry, I’ve seen this movie before remember, so my expectations were and are low. He really is just a very nice guy, not at all bad to look at, who I happen to have a good time with. Now, here is where the pageant rules come in.
As the evening ended, with the good bye kiss and a hug, I’d get a score card with a very easy to understand scoring system. There could be categories (like in a pageant) such as: chemistry (10 pts), sense of humor (10), personality (10), good kisser (10), etc…and then one could assume the closer the score was to 100, the more likely it would be that there would be a date in our future. Do you know how much easier this would make the next day for women? If there was a 70 or below, put that one in the Fun but no cigar column, 75-85, hit or miss depending on his options, 85-100, and well, start shopping for outfit for date number 2. Doesn’t this make sense to you? I, personally, would greatly appreciate the feedback.
Well, since I’m not in charge of the world, this system is not in place so I will continue to live life thinking “Why wouldn’t he want a 2nd or even 3rd date with me? I’m really all that!” and will just assume that we are on the 2 year plan…it took a year from meeting to kiss for the 1st time and then 8 months after that kiss to go out and kiss a second time so really, in 4 months, you should be reading about him again. But, seriously, I do believe once he realizes that I’m not a stalker, text him all the time, clingy, picking out a wedding dress, writing our names in hearts kinda gal, he’ll be very happy he ranked me in the 85-100 category…heck, I’d even go for a 98!
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